Because, as I’ve already stated above: Heaven’s existence is inherently predicated on the knowledge of “sin”, and therefore a soul-themed credit score. Rhymes with “karma”, maybe. Who knows? Any way you spice it, credit makes heaven — that is, if innumerable denominations, et al, are any proof of. 🤷🏽‍♂️

You know it does. Where do you think “virginity” was invented? Hell is where the parties’re at and there’s no inherent need for a currency system in that dynamic. Heaven, on the other hand, is founded on an imaginary and largely arbitrary credit system. Ergo, money exists there.

The fact that the reply used “hieroglyphics” and cats have been pulling this shit longer ago than those were used as written language… And said poster’s argument was that “someday” that wouldn’t be the case?

Have they met a fucking cat?!

So is John Mulaney. Again. Yass.

Yup.

Feminine hips and high waist?

“What kind of idiot do you take me for?”

“No, thanks. You can stay right where you are.”

Might go for a walk!

Which, IIRC, insinuated that their mother was a snackish breeder and their father was a gin drunk. (Also, that she was past tense?)

Try avocados. Loads more potassium, no rad load. 🤌🏽

MFW some rando makes it clear they have no idea what DeadJournal was. 😶🤷🏽

And a magat flag 🖕🏿

Christ on a pogo stick. 🤦🏽‍♂️ You’re one of them? Ew.

FWIW, I used to compete in “Bible Quiz” on my church’s team and made it to regionals before the elders realized they were training a group of teens to be able to argue their points and win. Besides, Cheezus ain’t no Joshua. Stay in your lane, ya blue box biproduct. 🤌🏽

Oh, so “edgelord”. Gotcha. 🙇🏽‍♂️

I can honestly say that I’ve yet to’ve seen a more beautiful and personally targeted use of this meme. The game is afoot, sir/madam.

p.s. You don’t walk on water, heal wounds, call down plagues, or wake the dead, right? Just checking.

Seems like downtime in a Souls game.

<These are not the dongs you’re looking for.>

Yes?

This life is not a meritocracy. Don’t drink the fuckin’ Democracy™ juice. Be nicer to yourself and then, with that surplus, be nicer to others. 🙇🏽‍♂️🥳